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It's Not About the Nail: Quiz for Couples

Can you relate?

It's Not About the Nail from Jason Headley on Vimeo.

Upon first glance this video may seem absurd.  But what I love about it is that it provides a light-hearted example of how we often get caught with one another in a negative cycle, and how folks tend to miss each other.  It's what I like to call a "both/and" instead of an "either/or".  Yes, it probably would be good for the nail (the "problem") to come out (the "fix"), but what would make that easier is some empathy ("listening").  If couples (and others in relationship) could have a better understanding and appreciation for what goes on for the other in these dynamics, the chances are greater for them to stay connected to resolve the issues in a way that leaves them both feeling good.


This quiz helps you gauge the "A.R.E" level of your connection with your partner.
A.R.E. stands for:

  • Accessibility: Can I reach you?
  • Responsiveness: Can I rely on you to respond to me emotionally?
  • Engagement: Do I know you will value me and stay close?